Itching to get in the Dirt

I know, I've got to hold my horses, 'cause it's a community garden I'm "running" here....but after a lovely several hours with a fresh-breath-of-air friend from the past, I just want to live in the garden.

But I can't, just yet, so I sip my kombucha in honor of her visit and I contemplate re-stringing my guitar to get my creative fix....I swear it will happen soon. For now, a bit of reflection. I find myself trying to balance life between the familial (one studiously busy husband, 2 playfully busy daughters), the amicable (dear, intense friendships), the academic (which I love, which stimulate me, but for which I am more and more unprepared and from which I derive more and more humility as it is revealed to me that my old brain is not as keen as it once was), and the creative (music, garden, writing) spheres of life. Thankfully, they have a great deal of overlap (and are all under the grand heading of the worshipful). I just find myself wishing for a bunch more time....and having to hold all things loosely (no perfectionism allowed here, thank you!).

As soon as any of these become items of my worship instead of items through which I worship, then the idol factory that is my heart comes whirring to life, cranking out miniatures that would look an awful lot like me under scrutiny.

So what does it look like to avoid this graven-image manufacturing? I believe it is not running and hiding from passions & dreams in order to secure my heart, locked up in a kind of spiritually contemplative prison away from temptation, suffering, pain. Rather, I believe investing my skill, creativity, intellect, relational gifts where I can, stepping back often to gain perspective, watching things grow under the sight of Heaven, realizing I am not in control--basically, "holding things loosely"--is what I must do. Constantly reaching out and taking risks, making culture; all the while looking up and ahead, holding the hand of my Father, so as not to be completely undone when things fail or projects come to their end.

For, one day, all things will be made new, and the investment made here on earth will be proved to be the roots of tress of ever-bearing fruit...when heaven comes.